The other day I was working with a client who said, “I know I have no right to be unhappy. I have a good job. I have a nice place to live. I have this wonderful dog – and yet I’m still unhappy. I realize I should be happy for all of this. I realize I should be grateful! But I can’t be…”
Most likely you’ve heard that to create what you want in your life, you have to feel grateful for what you already have.
But what happens when even just TRYING to feel grateful doesn’t work? What happens when you can’t feel grateful for your job or your spouse or your… whatever it is?
Well, many people (most of us in fact!) start to beat themselves up. Just like my client was. She continually invalidated her feelings because she knew there were other people who were in worse situations.
I’ve even seen this in people with their animal’s behavior problems. “He barks all the time and I hate it, but I’m just trying to be grateful to have him in my life…”
It’s REALLY hard to do that. It’s really hard to tell yourself you SHOULD be grateful, when it’s not what you’re actually feeling.
So, what to do when you’re unhappy about something – but you can’t get yourself to that place of gratitude?
Go for mini-moments. And not mini-moments of gratitude (that would still be too hard) but mini-moments of happiness.
What counts as a mini-moment? Spending 30-seconds:
-Eating the best piece of chocolate ever
-Watching kitten yawning videos on Youtube
-Turning your face up to the sun to notice the warmth on your cheeks
I think you get the picture, here right? All of these mini-moments shift your thoughts from what you don’t have or from how you’re supposed to be feeling different (ie grateful) to the very present NOW moment. In a positive way.
Eventually, with enough mini-moments under your belt, the other moments in your life will begin to shift to match them.
Without you having to MAKE change happen. Without having to find gratitude where you can’t. Without you having to do anything other than enjoy 30 seconds of your life.
Love and Light,
PS: There’s a cool new way to work with your emotions – and it’s working with your pet. Have you read Animal Lessons yet?